You Will Not Change Until The Pain of Staying Where You Are Becomes Greater Than The Pain of Change

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Change is a choice. It is a process, not an event. Your success – whether you are a student or out of school, a parent, an entrepreneur, a leader or manager, a worker, or a professional – is determined by how fast you adapt to changes which are happening around you. But most often than not people wait for triggering situations, which are sometimes fatal, to happen before they embrace change.

In his book, Soaring Higher, Pat Mesiti wrote Lesson No. 49 titled, You Will Not Change Until The Pain of Staying Where You Are Becomes Greater Than The Pain of Change. He said:

Change doesn’t occur by chance. It occurs by choice. And that choice is often triggered by something.

Over the years I have worked with many young men who were in the process of recovering from personal battles with addictions. Many times I watched parents who tried unsuccessfully to bribe their sons, to coerce their sons, to plead with their sons to break their addictive habits. The only people I ever met who had won their battle with addictive habits were those who had hit rock bottom. Their lives became so painful for them that they had to change.

To become successful, you must determine to beat complacency. Wishful thinking will not make you successful. You won’t change, you won’t become successful, until you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired. Pain is a great motivator. Pain will cause you to get up and do something. Pain will get you back in the saddle.

How many people do you know who are relying on a lotto win to improve their lives? They want the house, the car, the overseas holiday, but it never happens. Then suddenly when the creditor is at the door, the house is about to be confiscated, the car is about to be repossessed, some pain hits them and they begin to do something about improving their lives.

One of my friends became an incredibly successful businessman after he was fired from his job. He didn’t like his job, but it had been his security. When he was fired, the pain and humiliation caused him to choose between two options. One option he faced was to give up, thrown in the towel, and quit striving for a better life. His second option was to start his own business. He chose the second option, and today he’s a multi-millionaire. The pain of getting fired and hitting rock bottom caused him to break through complacency to become the businessman he was destined to be.

It’s the same with our relationships. You may be going through a very painful relationship right now. What are you doing about it? You can either stay in that zone of pain, or you can want to change. Eventually the pain may become so unbearable that you decide to do something about it.

You may have a habit, and that habit may be detrimental to your health, but it may annoy your wife. Eventually, you may get to a point where you decide, ‘I can’t handle the nagging anymore, I’ve got to change!’

Some habits are detrimental to your health. One of my friends had a terrible problem with his weight. It wasn’t until he had a massive heart attack that he decided to change his diet. He didn’t change his diet because of the weight problem, he changed his diet when he had the heart attack.

Further Mesiti challenged:

Some of you may look at your life and say, ‘I wish I had a better income’ or ‘I wish I had a better business’ or ‘I wish I have a nice car’. Don’t wait until it’s too late to change. If the pain is already so intense, use that pain now to make a change, to break through into a better life, to start a new business, to apply for a new job, to invest time in your wife or husband, to wake up earlier each day to enjoy the sunrise.

Paul Mesiti is right. Let’s us not wait for the most painful thing to happen before we change or if we are left with no time. We need to assess or reassess our lives’ situations and decide.

Read, learn, lead!

Paul Mesiti’s book, Soaring Higher and other self-help, motivational and inspirational books and reading materials are now available at Nice Book Club. Visit us now and be the first to read Soaring Higher for free. Read, learn, lead!

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